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The goal is not to win. The goal is face your demons, your fears, your doubt, your past, your expectations. Face them and then do in spite of them. You don't even have to defeat them. All you have to do, is do, and not let it stop you. That is the Real Goal.  It is holy and it is scared. It is the mission of every person.  The endpoint, dream or outcome is the vehicle to achieve the real goal. Win over your self and the outcome won't matter. 

As a parent we are here to protect the kids from harms they don't know about. In order to "toughen" them up for the harsh world ahead, g ive them love and give them love and the give some more. You can't punish your way to good behavior We let them fall as needed but we need to be there to help them back up. Most of the world is confusing to them, our job is to help them understand what is happening. They only have a limited number of tools to deal with their difficult emotions. They go to their known tools, crying, arguing, whining. This is what they know.  We have to teach them better ways of dealing with how they feel because most of the time they don't understand what or how to deal with the problems they are confronted with.  

Life is never done or finished. It's a juggling, managing, in process, fixing, repairing, hurting, healing and all the in between. Things can get done. Then new things come and old things go. Life is so much more than things. Life isn't lived at the finish line. It's lived by putting one foot in front of the other, every single moment of every single day. Take another step. 

we all have a meeting with our fate we are all destined to do what we came here to do we all have that moment when we realize this is it we are the choice to act on it or not our free will is to decide to act on our fate or not our fate chooses us, we choose to do or not to do if you free will not to do, your life may be fine but it will not be fulfilled and there always be a longing if you fate, you will become fully realized  

It doesn't matter what they look like, how old they are, how big or small. They all have broken hearts that needs mending. Nothing physical on a person really matters. Some of us have disabilities that everyone can see. Those disabilities become the catalyst to hasten the bond, if it breaks, it was weak to begin with, if it becomes stronger, there was nothing that could have kept you two apart.   It's discovering the kind of person they are and what you admire and learn from them.  It’s discovering who you are through their eyes. You have to overcome what you see and feel with your eyes to determine who they are. If their disability is that are very attractive, you have be able to overcome that lens and see deeper, if they are unattractive to your view, you have to uncover what they are beyond that.  The truth lies in determining if they are worth the effort it takes to remove your filter. We think that once i get to know them,  I will decide to l...

Trying to make someone or ourselves behave better or different through punishment is instilling fear to modify the behavior. The fear makes us immobilized and less likely to change because we are pushing against an external influence. Can it work? Sure, if you make the stick big enough.  A better way is to plant the reason for change from within.  It is next to impossible to ignore is pressure that comes from within. It is always with us, the beating drum getting stronger as the pressure increases. Trying to ignore it or bury it, gives strength to the beat and it grows louder.  What fosters change is accepting and giving love which will give energy to make the change.  We try to punish ourselves into a being a good person, or a changed person. We don't need more punishment, we need more love.  

           We all have regrets. Things that we wish we had done differently, things that we believe would have be “better” if we had made a different choice. If we only had tried harder, pushed more, turned left. We tend to dwell more on these things when times are hard or we are in trouble. When things aren’t going well, we tend to narrow our vision of the past on things that we believe would have led to a different outcome.             Perhaps if we done some things differently, it would be different. Those changes would have a ripple effect on your entire life. The things bring happiness now would also be different. If you were conceived a few minutes later or before when you were actually conceived, you might not exist. No more you. We may have regrets about some of the choices we made, but we also have the good things with those regrets.

     In our culture to make everyone as comfortable as possible (participation trophies, not keeping score, include everyone , etc), we miss out on the valuable lessons of being uncomfortable, not to mention the lessons from pain. The problem with getting out of pain is that it removes the drive to change.       Being uncomfortable makes us take notice, being in pain forces us to look at ourselves. We love talking about other people's troubles and pain because it allows us to focus on their problems and distracts us from looking within. People will do anything and everything as long as they don't have to look at how they are responsible for how they are feeling. Most of us don't want to admit that who we are and how we feel is mostly nurture and not nature. The shape of our ears or how our second toe is taller that our big toe is not up to us. What we think, how we feel, who we blame and what we do is all on us.  

     What is good test to determine how you really feel about someone? Try sitting in silence with them. No matter where you are, how you are feeling, how they are feeling, try sitting in silence with them. If you feel uncomfortable and they feel uncomfortable, the bond isn't as strong as you think.       Being able to sit with someone in silence and not be concerned that you have to fill it up with conversation says a lot about the bond. Being able to sit in silence and be at peace, is a great indicator of the status of that relationship. It shows that you really are not concerned about how they perceive you or are unsure about where you stand with them.        This is very difficult to do with most people. We all have associations and memories and issues with almost everyone. Even strangers. As human beings we tend to judge everything that comes into our world. It's a survival tactic so we can assess whether somethi...

            It is easier to be negative because it is a lower level of energy. It takes more energy to be positive. It’s easier to find the bad things, the wrong things, the things that don’t work. It takes a lot more energy to create, build, praise and uphold than to critique what is already created. We’ve all been battered through life with bad things and it’s much easier to wallow in it than to pick yourself up. In order to pick yourself up, you have to realize that it’s on you, your effort, your energy. It’s easier to blame others, talk about others because it doesn’t force us to look in the mirror and realize the bad things might be our fault. This isn’t to justify people being negative, it’s just an explanation. People naturally tend to take the path of least resistance. Least resistance is how our species evolved.               Our biology has developed to conserve energy because ...